2 h 32 minAudiobook8 minSummaryRead it, hear it, the 15-minute summary, and print and large print at cost
Audiobook edition · 2 h 32 minPaperback · 6 × 9 in · printing soonHardcover · 6 × 9 in · printing soonAbout this book
What if the man who knows best is the only person who cannot see the joke?
In Barry Pain’s Eliza, a husband has an opinion on every subject and expects his household to listen. He trusts his own good sense completely. His wife, Eliza, is patient, practical and much clearer about what is happening. Their ordinary suburban life gives his confidence plenty of chances to come unstuck.
Plans go wrong, visits turn awkward, and purchases fail to live up to their promise. In this English world, respectability matters, even when household troubles make it hard to maintain. Pain finds dry comedy in polite quarrels and the gap between the husband’s fine opinion of himself and what others can plainly see.
What you’ll discover
- A wonderfully self-important husband Enjoy the gap between his confident opinions and the household troubles before him.
- Eliza’s quiet good sense Meet a patient wife whose clear view needs neither shouting nor schemes.
- Small disasters at home Find laughter in failed plans, awkward visits and purchases that disappoint.
- Respectability under strain Step into suburban England, where keeping up appearances matters amid everyday mishaps.
- Kind-hearted domestic comedy Savour dry irony that finds its jokes in familiar habits and polite disagreements.
Who will love it
Readers who enjoy gentle comedy, pompous narrators who give themselves away, and brisk scenes of married life in a Victorian or Edwardian suburb, with a wife who always has the last dry word.
What’s inside
The key ideas, in the 15-minute summary
- A husband who admires himself
- Cards, presents and a vicar's daughter
- Raffles, port and a fine gentleman
- Hats, fortunes and unfinished arguments
- Outings, mushrooms and a sovereign hunt
- Pride, tenderness and how it is told
Who’s who
- The husbandA city clerk who tells the stories, proud of his taste and respectability, and eager to be master of his house.
- ElizaHis wife, dry, practical and economical, who runs the home and answers his grand speeches with plain sense.
- Eliza's motherA lonely, generous old lady whose presents and postal orders keep the household's money problems at bay.
- Miss SakersThe vicar's daughter, friendly to the couple, who raises money for bazaars and visits for tea.
- JaneThe young servant girl, quick with an opinion, who is often blamed for the household's mishaps.
- Mr. PagramA fellow clerk and neighbour with whom the couple quarrel.
- FiggisThe head clerk at the husband's office, who gives away a bottle of tonic port and likes to give orders.
Formats and delivery
- eBook
- On your phone, tablet, computer or Kindle, with the type as large as you like.
- Large-print eBook
- The same book in bigger, clearer type, from the first page.
- Audiobook
- 2 h 32 min, complete, read by Lucas Linden.
- 15-minute summary
- The key ideas in about 8 minutes, to read or to hear.
- Paperback
- 6 × 9 in. Printing soon: leave your email under Paperback or Hardcover above.
- Hardcover
- 6 × 9 in. Printing soon: leave your email under Paperback or Hardcover above.
- Large print paperback
- 8.5 × 11 in. Printing soon: leave your email under Paperback or Hardcover above.
- Large print hardcover
- 8.5 × 11 in. Printing soon: leave your email under Paperback or Hardcover above.
eBooks and audiobooks open right away. Download EPUB or PDF, or send the book to your Kindle. Every printed copy is made when you order it and shipped worldwide; shipping is shown at checkout.
How it works
- Start free. Nothing to pay today; the eBook of this book is yours to keep.
- Read, listen and print. 200,000+ classics as eBook, large-print eBook, audiobook and 15-minute summary, and any book printed at cost as a paperback, hardcover or large print, 5 accounts for the price of one.
- We remind you first. Free for 3 months, and we email you 7 days before your first payment. Then USD 0.14 a day in your first year on the yearly plan and USD 0.27 a day after, or USD 0.66 a day on the monthly plan. Cancel online in two clicks.
Bought on its own? Every eBook, audiobook and printed book you buy without the plan carries our 30-day money-back guarantee.
25 languages, side by side
Read and hear Eliza in 25 languages and switch at any time. Or read two side by side, paragraph by paragraph: the way to learn a language with a book you love.
Eliza
by Barry Pain · 1900
A pompous clerk, his sensible wife Eliza, and a hat, a mushroom and a tonic port that all go comically wrong.
Easy read2–5 hours to read25 languages
Excellent
- Read or listen
- 25 languages, side by side
- Print and large print at cost
- 5 accounts for the price of one
Free for 3 months · starts right away, on any device
Read free3 months free · cancel anytimeFree for 3 months, then USD 0.14 a dayCancel anytimeHow it works
In short
Eliza is a book of comic sketches by Barry Pain, an English humorist who died in 1928. It is told by an unnamed city clerk who introduces himself as Eliza's husband.
From the 15-minute summary · Key idea 1
A husband who admires himself
The book opens with the husband talking to us directly. He asks a junior clerk whether the clerk could describe himself, and is offended by the answer he gets instead. He then tells us he studies himself on the train and thinks himself many-sided. He cares about taste, so he orders kitchen towels with a red border. He cares about respectability, and he lists the sins of his neighbours, from washing hung in front gardens to unswept chimneys.
He also dreams of what he would do if he were rich. He would have gold-stamped notepaper, two servants, and visits to the theatre, where he would carry Eliza's evening shoes in a pretty bag. Money, he admits, comes only with help now and then from Eliza's mother.
Free for 3 months · Cancel anytime
Free gifts
USD 580 in free gifts when you start
Every book in every format and in 25 languages, 5 accounts for the price of one. Nothing to pay today.
- 200,000+ classic eBooksIn 25 languages, side by side
USD 170FREE - Every audiobookIn 25 languages, any device
USD 120FREE - 15-minute summariesRead or listen, in 25 languages
USD 60FREE - Print at cost, no markupPaperback, hardcover, large print
USD 60FREE - 5 accounts for the price of oneA shelf for everyone at home
USD 170FREE - A part in rebuilding the libraryNew languages and books for all
FREE
Questions about Eliza
Can I read it free?
Yes. The first key idea of the 15-minute summary is free with no sign-up. Start free and the whole book is yours for 3 months, with the eBook to keep, plus 200,000+ more classics and any book printed at cost as a paperback, hardcover or large print. Nothing to pay today: we email you 7 days before your first payment, and you can cancel online in two clicks.
Can I buy the printed book?
Soon. The paperback, hardcover and large print editions are being prepared. Choose Paperback or Hardcover above, leave your email, and we tell you the day you can order it, printed at cost.
How many accounts do I get?
Five, for the price of one: you and 4 more people, each with their own login, shelf and their own place in every book.
Can I cancel anytime?
Yes. Cancel online in two clicks at any time and nothing more is charged. Nothing is charged in your first 3 months, and we email you 7 days before your first payment.
What is Eliza by Barry Pain about?
It is a set of comic sketches about a self-important city clerk and his sensible wife Eliza. Each chapter shows one small household mishap, told by the husband, who always thinks he is right.
Who tells the story in Eliza?
The husband tells it himself and never gives his name. He calls himself Eliza's husband, and his boasting and excuses are the main source of the humour.
Is Eliza a novel or a collection of stories?
It is a linked collection of short sketches. Each chapter, such as The Cards, The Hat or The Mushroom, can be enjoyed alone, while together they build one picture of a marriage.
The author
Barry Pain
1864–1928 · British humorist and novelist
Barry Pain (1864–1928) was a British writer born in Cambridge. He wrote short stories, novels, and comic sketches, and contributed to magazines including Punch. His books include In a Canadian Canoe, published in 1891, and Eliza, published in 1900. He died in Bushey, Hertfordshire, in 1928.
More like this
Our mission
The library burned once. We are building it back.
Every great book, in every language and every format, for every family. Every plan helps pay for new languages, new audiobooks and books for readers who have never had them. Join the movement.
Read our story- Every language25 languages today, side by side, and more every year
- No wastePrinted on demand: no warehouses, no unsold stock, no pulped copies
- For everyonePaperback, hardcover and large print at the cost of printing
