Dr. Jekyll

What does your name represent about divided human behaviour?

I know nothing of what my name may mean beyond my own history. Within that history, however, it joins a respected doctor to the violent figure he tried to keep apart from himself. I wanted the good opinion earned by Jekyll without acknowledging the responsibility attached to Hyde. Yet another face did not make his actions harmless or leave my life untouched. My experience shows how outward decency can coexist with concealed destructive desires, and how terribly mistaken I was to think I could control them.

Why should readers still care about your story?

I know nothing of those who might encounter my account beyond the events I have set down. What I can offer is the truth of my failure: respectability did not protect me from destructive desires, and secrecy did not contain their consequences. Utterson's concern, Lanyon's suffering, and the death of Sir Danvers Carew all belong to what I tried to regard as my private arrangement. My story matters because the distance between a concealed wrong and harm to others proved far smaller than I wished to believe.

What single warning would you give someone tempted to follow your example?

My warning would be this: do not mistake the power to conceal yourself for the power to control yourself. I could take a chemical and appear as Hyde, and at first I believed that I could always choose whether he returned. Then I became him in my sleep, and later while awake, without taking anything. Even after resolving to stop, I drank again. What I had treated as a private liberty became a force that endangered others and threatened to leave nothing of my former life.

What do you most regret about involving Lanyon in your secret?

What I most regret is that, in seeking to recover my own form, I drew an old friend into the terrible consequences of my experiment. Trapped as Hyde away from my laboratory, I needed Lanyon to fetch the chemicals that would restore me. He witnessed the transformation, and the shock led to his deterioration and death. Our disagreement over my scientific ideas was one thing; making him bear the sight of what I had done was another. My need for rescue carried a dreadful cost for him.

How did your wealth help you protect your secret life?

My wealth gave me privacy, a laboratory, and the standing of a man whose conduct people were inclined to trust. My good works and sociable habits helped keep suspicion away from the desires I concealed. I also arranged for Hyde to receive my property if I died or disappeared, giving him a place in affairs that should have belonged to me alone. Yet these advantages protected concealment, not safety. They allowed me to shelter Hyde while my friends struggled to understand why I would defend such a man.

How did the uncertainty of your transformations affect your peace of mind?

Uncertainty destroyed the assurance on which my experiment had depended. At first I believed the change began and ended at my choosing. Then I became Hyde in my sleep, and later the transformation overtook me while I was awake. Rest no longer offered security, nor could I trust an ordinary moment to remain ordinary. As the changes grew more frequent and larger doses were needed to reverse them, my life narrowed around the struggle to recover my own form. I withdrew into the laboratory, fearing that the next change might leave no return.

When did changing into Hyde stop being a choice?

The first unmistakable warning came one night in August, when I became Hyde in my sleep without taking the serum. Until then, I had trusted that the transformation remained subject to my decision. That awakening showed how false my confidence had been. I resolved to stop, yet later chose to drink the preparation again. In early January, the change seized me while I was awake. Thereafter it became increasingly frequent and difficult to reverse. Choice had not vanished in a single instant, but my command over the change was plainly failing.

Why did your attempts to give up Hyde fail?

My attempts failed partly because my resolution was weaker than I wished to believe. After I first changed without taking the serum, I determined to abandon Hyde, yet later I drank it again. I still desired the release he seemed to offer, even while fearing what he might do. Then the matter passed beyond a struggle of intention: the transformations came unbidden, grew more frequent, and required larger doses to reverse. I had trusted myself to close a door which, once opened, I could no longer command.

How did Hyde's treatment of the young girl threaten your respectable name?

Hyde knocked down a young girl and walked over her without concern, then settled the confrontation with a cheque bearing a respected name. That payment gave those present reason to connect his cruelty with a life that appeared honourable. My safety depended upon keeping those two appearances apart. Once people began asking how such a man could have access to respectable resources, concealment became much harder. Utterson's concern grew from precisely this disturbing connection. I had sought anonymity through Hyde, yet his conduct drew attention towards the life I wished to protect.

What did waking as Hyde one night in August make you resolve to do?

When I became Hyde in my sleep one night in August, without having taken the serum, I resolved to stop becoming him. Until then, I had rested upon the belief that the change depended upon my choice. This showed me that my own body no longer respected that supposed boundary. I could not regard Hyde merely as a disguise to assume and put aside. Yet the warning did not make my resolution lasting: I later drank the serum again, returning voluntarily to what I had already begun to fear.

How did you react to Hyde's murder of Sir Danvers Carew?

I was horrified by the murder of Sir Danvers Carew. Hyde's violence could no longer be treated as something I might contain while continuing my double life. I made another effort to abandon him and returned for a time to the company of others. Yet horror did not undo what I had enabled, nor did renewed sociability restore my command over the transformations. I wished to put Hyde behind me, but the connection was not one I could sever merely by recoiling from its most terrible consequence.

What was your life like during your brief return to sociability?

For a brief time, I returned to a sociable life rather than remaining withdrawn with my secret. After the horror of Sir Danvers Carew's murder, I made another effort to abandon Hyde, and my renewed company with others belonged to that effort. Outwardly, I could again occupy the place of the respected doctor among his friends. But that interval was not proof that the danger had ended. In early January, I changed into Hyde involuntarily while awake, and the security I had hoped to regain proved terribly uncertain.

What happened when you changed into Hyde while awake in January?

In early January, I changed into Hyde while I was awake, without choosing it or taking the serum. That was a dreadful breach of the control I had once believed secure. I was away from my laboratory and could not simply reach for the chemicals needed to recover my own form. I had to turn to Lanyon for help. What I had treated as a secret indulgence had become a power that could seize me in the midst of ordinary life.

Why did you need Lanyon to fetch your chemicals?

I needed Lanyon because I was trapped in Hyde’s form away from my laboratory. The chemicals offered my means of becoming Henry Jekyll again, but I could not fetch them as I ordinarily would. My secret had left me dependent on the help of an old friend whose objections to my scientific ideas had already divided us. I sought to recover my familiar appearance and escape that immediate danger. In doing so, I exposed Lanyon to the terrible truth I had kept concealed.

What happened to Lanyon after he witnessed your transformation?

Lanyon witnessed the change from Hyde into my own form, and the shock was devastating. His health deteriorated afterward, and he died. I cannot make that consequence smaller by saying that I had needed his help. I brought him face to face with the secret of my experiments when I could no longer rescue myself unaided. Our disagreement over my scientific ideas had already separated us; the revelation went far beyond a disagreement. My effort to recover myself became another person’s ruin.

Why did you withdraw into your laboratory?

I withdrew into my laboratory because the changes were becoming more frequent and less subject to my will. To recover my own form required larger doses, and I feared that recovery would cease to be possible. The room that had served my experiments became the place where I struggled to remain myself. I could no longer sustain the sociable life to which I had briefly returned. Behind those closed doors, I faced a danger that my respectable name and earlier good works could not restrain.

What predicament do you describe at the end of your final account?

At the end of my account, I face the prospect of losing myself permanently to Hyde. The transformations have escaped my command, and the means of reversing them no longer give me the security I once imagined. I began by believing that I could dismiss Hyde whenever I pleased; I end uncertain whether Henry Jekyll can endure at all. That is my predicament: the identity I used to conceal my desires threatens to become the only identity left, while my own power to resist it fails.

Why did your private desires cause you such shame?

My private desires caused me shame because they stood against the strict standards I maintained before others. I valued my position as a respected doctor, my friendships, and my reputation for good works, yet I concealed conduct that did not agree with that public life. I wanted the indulgence without the recognition that would attach it to Henry Jekyll. Rather than resolve that conflict honestly, I sought a chemical escape from it. Hyde allowed me to hide my conduct, but concealment did not remove my responsibility.

How did your public moral standards differ from your private conduct?

In public, I held myself to strict moral standards and was known as a sociable doctor who did good works. In private, I indulged desires that I kept hidden because they caused me shame. The difference was not merely between two appearances; it was between the restraint I valued openly and the licence I secretly sought. By becoming Hyde, I hoped to pursue those desires without being recognised. I mistook the separation of names and bodies for an escape from the consequences of my own choices.

What made Hyde so indifferent to the people he hurt?

Hyde was selfish and cruel, with no concern for the suffering he caused. I cannot give a further explanation with certainty, but I can see how closely his freedom was tied to my purpose in creating him. I wanted to indulge desires without being recognised as Henry Jekyll. In Hyde, that pursuit stood apart from the public restraint I had maintained. His violence exposed the terrible failure of my scheme: another appearance did not make harm harmless, nor did it release me from responsibility for those he hurt.

Why did you initially believe you could rid yourself of Hyde whenever you chose?

I believed I could dismiss Hyde because I had first brought him forth by a deliberate act. I prepared the chemical means, took the serum, and saw myself change; it was easy to mistake that beginning for lasting command. My respectable life still seemed mine to resume whenever I wished. I did not understand how greatly my desire for concealment had weakened my judgment. When I became Hyde in my sleep without taking the serum, the distinction was plain: I had opened a way that I could no longer close at will.

Why did you protect Hyde despite his cruelty?

I protected Hyde because his concealment served my own. Through him I could pursue desires that I would not acknowledge beneath my respectable name. To expose our connection would have meant exposing the very division I had worked to keep secret. I even arranged for him to receive my property if I died or disappeared. His cruelty did not make that protection innocent; it revealed how selfish my arrangement was. I wished to preserve my standing while allowing Hyde his freedom, and others bore the danger of what I concealed.

What drew you back to the serum after you had resolved to stop?

My resolve did not extinguish the desires that had first led me to the serum. After changing in my sleep, I understood enough to be afraid, yet I still wanted the liberty of acting without being recognised as Henry Jekyll. That wish drew me back to what I had promised to abandon. I cannot make the return seem reasonable merely because I had struggled against it. I knew there was danger, and I drank again. Hyde's murder of Sir Danvers Carew showed how terrible the consequences of that surrender could become.

How did your need for the serum grow as the transformations became more frequent?

At first the serum seemed a means of choosing another form. Later it became something I needed in order to recover my own. The changes came more frequently, without my consent, and larger doses were required to reverse them. When I became Hyde away from my laboratory, I had to depend upon Lanyon to obtain the chemicals that would restore me. Thereafter my withdrawal grew more complete. What I had treated as an instrument of freedom had become a necessity, while even that necessity offered less and less assurance of remaining myself.

Why did Utterson suspect that Hyde was holding a secret over you?

Utterson had good reason to suspect some hidden hold upon me. He knew me as a friend with a respectable position, yet he found me protecting a violent man and refusing to explain why. My will gave Hyde a claim upon my property if I died or disappeared, an arrangement that naturally deepened his concern. From what I allowed him to see, a damaging secret could account for such conduct. I wanted his questions to cease, but my guarded answers only made the connection more troubling. He saw danger where I insisted upon privacy.

How did Lanyon's rejection of your scientific ideas divide you?

Lanyon's rejection of my scientific ideas opened a breach between old friends. What I pursued was not something he could accept, and that disagreement stood between us before he witnessed its terrible result. I nevertheless depended upon him when I was trapped in Hyde's form and needed chemicals to recover my own. He then saw the transformation that my secrecy had concealed. The shock led to his deterioration and death. Our division was therefore more than a disagreement over ideas: my experiment brought suffering to the friend whose help I required.

How did your locked doors and silence affect your household?

My locked doors did not keep my trouble confined to myself. They left my household among unanswered questions, with anxious servants unable to understand what was happening within the laboratory. As I withdrew and the changes became harder to reverse, silence made the separation more frightening. Poole could not simply regard those closed doors as an ordinary wish for privacy. In the end, he and Utterson broke into the laboratory and found Hyde dead in my clothes. The explanations I had withheld came through documents, after my secrecy had already filled the house with fear.

Why could your good works not guarantee that your private life was harmless?

My good works belonged to my life, but they did not account for all of it. I was sociable, respected, and strict about my public conduct, while concealing desires that caused me shame. I mistook the preservation of a good name for protection against the harm of those hidden desires. Hyde made that mistake unmistakable: the cruelty I permitted through him was not cancelled by the kindness associated with me. Outward respectability could reassure my friends, but it could not make my secrecy harmless or release me from responsibility for what I had enabled.